Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
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He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
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A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things