We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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