If i come over, it means nothing
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize