Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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