My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Girls should come with a carfax report
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
