is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
