That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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