I'm drive I can fine osifer
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
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