My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize