I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
