Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
