I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Randomize
