you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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