I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
