im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
This baby is an asshole
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
