Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
