you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
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Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
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She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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