it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
operation harelip BJ is a go
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
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You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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