You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
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