No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
