We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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