Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
