I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
