So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
