she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
He felt like a one man threesome
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Randomize