Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Randomize
