Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Barsexuality is the new black.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
