I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize