try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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