doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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