I'm really into asian looking animals
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I can't turn off my feet"
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
