So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
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