im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize