I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
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I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
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