are you still at the devil's house?
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
