are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
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