who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
