I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
