Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
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I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
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I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?