no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
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