My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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