Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
