Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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