I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Randomize
