The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I wish there were birth control emojis
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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