im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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