it wasn't lemon gatorade
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
