it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
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