I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize