Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
My pussy is not your playground.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
