The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
there is puke in my bra ... again
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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